Sunday, May 11, 2008

Daily Dying...

Happy Mother's Day! (To all the mothers who read this blog... :-) Ha!)

We decided to celebrate by bringing some KFC home for lunch. I wasn't really involved with picking out what to eat for lunch, (No one wanted Subway. Can you believe that???) but I had pretty much resigned myself to that fact that I probably wouldn't be able to eat it. So, we brought home the fried chicken, mashed potatoes, coleslaw, biscuits and honey, baked beans, etc. and I threw together a quick salad. Please don't misunderstand me - I'm not against eating these things! They're perfectly fine, in moderation. I just know that for me to stay on track with my weight loss goals I'm going to have to totally abstain from foods like those for awhile. I wasn't sitting there feeling like a superior person because I was eating more healthy. I was thinking, "Bekah, you've blown it in the past. But, you're changing! And someday you will be able to occasionally eat those foods again, but not right now. Enjoy the journey. Every time you say "no" to the flesh you're saying "yes" to the Spirit!".

So I was thinking (again!) as I was munching on my salad, how I'm trading the pleasure of eating those foods right now for a healthier body. Because to be honest, it smelled and looked really yummy! And if I wanted to, I could have come up with some kind of excuse to chow down today. But I have to focus on the future; the consequences of my actions. I've lived a life of indulgence, and it doesn't satisfy. Oh, it tastes good for a few minutes. But no matter how much you eat - your flesh craves more.

This is something I've been learning for the past 7 months. I can't tell you how many times I've passed up french fries, cookies, ice cream, chocolate, etc. It's not fun! (Especially when I'm sitting there feeding it to my younger sisters.) But, I've never once looked back at those moments and wished I would have given in to the temptation. Because I have given in at times, and it's not worth it.

Dying to the flesh is a hard, daily struggle. I'm learning and growing, but I still fall short. There is no magic prayer you can pray or certain verses you can memorize that will keep you from following your flesh. It takes a conscience, willful choice to walk in the Spirit and to cooperate with the Lord! And, sometimes it means giving up what seems so desirable. For me, it's food. For others, it may be choosing to praise instead of criticize, to show love instead of becoming annoyed and irritated, to serve instead of waiting for someone else to do it, to spend time with the Lord instead of filling the time with reading other books or doing other tasks that seem so important. (And I struggle with all of those things, too! It's not like food is my one and only struggle right now, though it's certainly in the forefront.)

Last week, I decided to type up and print off about 10 verses that I've been meditating on in regard to self control, and I backed the Scriptures with colorful cardstock and stuck them up all over our kitchen cabinets, our refrigerator, and the door to our pantry. It looks lovely! :-) But I wanted to have to look those Scriptures "in the eye" whenever I went to get food. That way I'd have to stand there and make sure I was walking in the Spirit, and I wasn't just feeding my appetite. And, I've caught myself already! But more than just warning signs, they're also encouraging to read as I seek to keep my focus on Jesus and my eyes on the goal. (And they really do have a nice rainbow effect on the kitchen!)

Fighting the good fight, Bekah

1 comment:

Grace Mally said...

Bekah, this was a blessing to me today! I like how you brought out that in all areas of life, although dying to our fleshly desires is hard, it brings a greater satisfaction. Thanks for reminding me of that.

Hope you are having a great day and enjoying the beauty of spring!
(It's full-blown summer in TX, so I'm happy to come back to Iowa spring!)

Love,
Grace